Monday, February 01, 2010

George Bush and my Neptune-Sun Transit

Last night I dreamed I was in a boat at night that capsized, and we were all left swimming in arctic waters. I knew I was going to die. After a while, I hit land off the coast of Norway. I was able to guide everyone else to safety too.

I think that is about right for the end of my Neptune-Sun transit (which has also coincided with my time on the astroblogosphere). With Neptune-Sun it can be like the light has gone out (night-time) and there is no solid ground underneath you. So we’ll see what happens. Pluto conjoining my one personal earth planet – Mars – will no doubt be implicated.

I’m reading American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld. It’s a fictionalised account of the lives of George and Laura Bush in the form of Charlie and Alice Blackwell. It’s a very good dissection of 2 incompatible characters, though how much they correspond to George and Laura is hard to say. It’s written in the 1st person, from Alice’s point of view. She is given the birthday of 6th April 1942, which doesn’t suit the character. Laura Bush’s birthday of 4th Nov 1946, though, works excellently for the Alice character. Sun in Scorpio trine Moon in Pisces: quiet, insightful, truthful, compassionate. Also a bit of a goody-goody and uptight.

It’s interesting that the rich people behave in exactly the same tedious, superior way that moneyed people in England do. I’ve only got to the point where Charlie/George buys his baseball team, but he is obsessed with his ‘legacy’, which Laura cannot understand. As she puts it, some men ‘panic’ about it, which sounds about right. I know glimpses of the feeling from the middle of the night, when I am briefly appalled at my lack of ‘legacy’. Then I return to my senses! It’s just another brainwashing that stops you actually living, and it’s the curse of ‘successful’ families. I’ve spent 30 years undoing this one, and the more I do so, the more I feel I’m connected to life. It’s a Saturn thing – I have Moon conjunct – which gives the ability to apply yourself over a long period and to become good at something. But it also curses you by reducing your self-respect to what you are good at, what you have to ‘show for yourself’, instead of self-respect as a natural part of being human.

A life on this planet is a very short, ephemeral thing in the grand scheme, in the vast stretches of time that have been and will be. It isn’t important enough to get so serious about a ‘legacy’ or an ‘achievement’ or about anything. Your legacy will be forgotten within a short time anyway, apart from as a measuring stick for your children and grandchildren to feel inadequate by! (It’s part of the 8th House of inheritance.) We’re only here very temporarily, so trying to create something solid and lasting is delusional. And it gets in the way of that wonderful, rich, charmed experience that day-to-day living can provide, if we’re not trying to improve on it!

Also spoken like someone at the end of a Neptune-Sun transit.

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m.p.k said...

I think our legacy, if we have any, is most meaningful to ourselves. What others think about us reflects more what they are like than what we are like. We all have the ability to be helpful to those in our immediate surroundings and something small may leave a bigger impression than anything we could have engineered.

I've been pursuing a career for 10 years now but it leaves little outward legacy. Yet it's been transformative to be able to grow in knowledge and skill even if those things are ultimately meaningless except as a series of internally satisfying progressions.

Kenna J said...

Beautiful post, Dharmaruci.

When I worked as a funeral director, I was struck by how some people thought their deceased loved one was a lot more important than other people. They would tell me stories of all their loved one had accomplished, and I would say WOW in appreciation. Inside, though, I knew that these families had to go on with their lives at this point, without the person, and that this made them the same as every other family I would see that day.

Their loved one was gone, gone, gone, GONE. Their loved one was just as gone as the ones who had hurt their family members without conscience, who were stingy or lazy, or who had led secret lives the families were only beginning to discover. They were just as gone as the countless people in the graves we would later walk on at the cemetery, some of whom had been gone so long that there was nobody left to remember them. Their bodies had become trash, basically, and their names were losing meaning by the second.

Despite what your parents or anyone else would have you believe, the only thing you truly have is time, and a limited amount at that.

sheris white said...

Very thought provoking last paragraph. My widowed mother in-law, lived for 43 years, dwelling on what might have been, if her very successful husband hadn't passed on. Her children never met her expectations nor did their partners. I've tried to remember that and not fall into the same trap by expecting too much from my children and grandchildren.

Finnyfang said...

I just finished a Neptune/Sun square and all my dreams were about traveling on roads that became more and more treacherous until they were nothing but a series of trenches (40 feet deep!) and craters that looked like a bomb-scape. In one dream my car fell off the road into a bayou that I lived near when I was a child. Whew! Glad if that's over.

tristan said...

As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field,for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more.........

Anonymous said...

Just smiles and reads...